Posts Tagged ‘Spirit guide’

Now Mom Knows

September 11, 2012


I just realized the post I wrote yesterday was still only a draft – I was sure I published it.  Well, now it is published for all the world to see.

I must admit, I have been dreading to day because I needed to tell Mom about the new home – I didn’t think she would be too happy about it.  Yesterday I talked to Kathy on the phone about how to approach it and she gave me some very good suggestions.  I had been wondering what to say and worried about how she would take the news.  I realized, at least in my head, that I needed to give it all to God, my spirit guides, angels and master teachers as well as Archangel Michael to help Mom have peace.  So I  had to really talk to myself about it, to release all the worrying and over analyzing, to just let it all go.  I truly had to put it in their hands for them to give me the words, actions, attitude, thoughts, etc. to tell Mom.  I had to not only just show up and get out of the way in my head – it had to be in my heart as well.  Strangely enough, I was fairly calm, though had trouble going to sleep last night.  I kept thinking about Mom, the things I could say, how she might react – second guessing about things that hadn’t even happened.  So I decided I needed something else to think about, so I switched to quilting – that actually did it for awhile.

When I got up this morning she was very confused, asking if this was her parents house, etc.  She ended up go in and out of bed 2 or 3 times – I was feeling anxious because I wanted to “get it over”.   But I knew that was only for my benefit, this had to be  about Mom and when the best time  would be for her.  So I waited until she was fully awake, dressed and had had breakfast.  Then I sat her down at the dining room table to tell her.  I mentioned the house she had stayed for a couple weeks and the lady there, Lucy; not really but that didn’t matter.  I told her I had found another home for her, a real house with a large yard, a place to be outside when it is nice and  how pretty it is.  I said the lady who owns it met her at the Center and talked to her; thought she was sweet and made her laugh.  She liked Mom so much she has invited Mom to come and live in her home.  I mentioned a little dog who loves people that comes to visit and there are some other ladies there.  She wanted to know when and I said on Wednesday.  I feel as if I had smacked her in the face, she seemed a bit stunned.  So far she isn’t angry, though she wonders how she is going to be able to do it all.  I told her I would take care of it for her.

I called Kathy and told her I had told her and she seemed to take it well.  Kathy planned to come over and visit, bring lunch for the two of them.  After I hung up, I made phone ring and pretended it was Kathy and told Mom she was coming to visit.  Mom was delighted because she really likes Kathy.  She stayed for about an hour or more, Aster and I were in the office talking.  So far Mom hasn’t said much, maybe she is trying to process it.  We’ll see what happens.


Mom didn’t say anything about moving to her new home, though Monday morning when I told Helima it would be her last Monday because Mom is going to a new home, Mom seemed confused.  So I just reminded her we had talked about it the day before and she  just said “Oh”.  Then  yesterday afternoon and evening she asked if she is going somewhere and when.  She seemed okay with it – I still don’t know how much has registered.  Kathy is coming to help today and tomorrow – I think having her will reassure Mom.

As for me, I am so tired and dragged out, I find everything takes so much energy and effort.  I did go to my caregiver support group yesterday afternoon – I think I have a difficult time, but the others have so much more to deal with than I do.  I did make an appointment for a massage with Debye on thursday morning, then I need to pick up Eddie in the afternoon.  Friday I want to meet Charlotte and accept her generous offer of the weighted baby doll – other than that, I don’t know.  At the moment I haven’t planned ahead, just want to sleep.  I know things will look different when I am more rested.

Odds & Ends

July 8, 2012

Some days it is so easy to write, other days – like today – I feel all jumbled up and not sure what to write.  There are several unrelated things I want to write about but there isn’t enough for a full post on any of them.  Hence the Odds & Ends title.

I am very frustrated because I cannot get my photos to be small enough so I can add a picture of Bunny to my post “There’s Something About Bunny”.  Mobile is closed on my Mac and I need a new computer, but I am waiting until the upgrade to Lion is in – I bought this computer just before leopard came out and so I had Tiger – but bought it just a little too soon to get the free upgrade.  This time I am going to start from the beginning.  Unless you have a Mac, no doubt what I just wrote makes very little sense to PC users.

Tuesday I went to Good Company Lunch – a networking group of people in Alternative Medicine, etc. – to some it’s the “woo woo group”.  I was sitting with my friend Kathie Brodie, a hypnotherapist and very close friend, and Brad Simkins, a therapist and intuitive who has a radio show.  We were at a restaurant that really isn’t conducive to our group because we were out in the restaurant with noise and at a long table.  So you could only talk comfortably with the people next to you or possibly across the table.  However, I know there was a reason the three of us were at the end of the table together.  They were asking how Mom was doing and I suddenly started getting drippy – fortunately it is a loving, supportive group and non-judgmental.  Suddenly Brad asked me “When did you first become your mother’s emotional support?”.  Ye Gods and little fishes!  I had no idea I was!  Well, let’s face it, the tough questions are what bring up what needs to be resolved.  They both knew some people who remember from an early age when it started; I don’t really know.  Nor did I ever think about it.  This is one of those to give it to God, Spirit Guides, Angels and Master Teachers for help and guidance plus put on the back burner and let it simmer.  Wracking my brain about it really is productive and I have enough to drive me crazy without adding another one to the mix.

Then Friday I had a lovely time with Kathie at Queen Mary Tea Room for lunch.  We went there a while back for their wonderful breakfast – what a delight they remembered me to make reservations.  We talked about Brad’s question, plus I had had my massage the day before and told Debye and Monty about it.  Monty had another question for me – “Where is it lodged in your body?”.  Great, just what I needed, another bloody question I hadn’t a clue about the answer.  What was so cool about Kathie was, she said to just ask my body what color it is, where is it and does it have a shape?  Then I can do psychic surgery on it to take it out.  She imagines she touches each fingernail and a sharp knife comes out, then she scoops the “stuff” out and gives it to the beings in Mother Earth who consume it and turn it back to positive.  These beings thrive on our negative stuff, plus then return it to the atmosphere in love and light.  Sometime it can be a spigot that one turns to drain it out – whatever works.  Right now I am listening for the color of it, then see if there is a shape.  It make take several times to clear everything – I’ll let you know when things happen.

I had the foundation of a crown done a couple of weeks ago – this coming Wednesday I am due to have the permanent crown put in to finish the job.  I will tell you, he did a real number on the right side of my mouth.  I expected the gum and jaw where was working to hurt, but good Lord, did the rest of that side have to hurt too?  I had a sore in my cheek, sores on my tongue and the whole side was really tender and uncomfortable.  This in addition to a sore I have had for a month behind my front teeth.  Having an over bite certainly didn’t help.  So I have been chewing on my left side and being very careful of both hot and cold things – pain shoots right up through the tooth where the temporary crown is.  Well, I am happy to say I am feeling a lot better and the right side of my mouth isa whole lot better -just have to chew on the left.  What a relief to have things more close to normal and comfortable again.

I have been going to visit Dr. Cheryl lately – she is the neatest chiropractor because he fingers not only feel what is going on, it is as if they can also see.  She is very gentle with me – none of the crack and pop stuff – because she knows me.  She sees me as a whole person and surrounds me with loving kindness.  It is a pleasure to lie on her table and see and feel what she is doing.  What’s interesting as well is that she has intuitive sights into me – she asked if I sang and I said I used to, though sometimes I sing in the car with the radio.  She said it would help for me to sing, that is no problem for me because at times I can’t not sing.  Also she mentioned flutes, to help, so I have been listening to bamboo flute music on Youtube.  I find Japanese, Chinese, Turkish, Thai, etc. and also I check out pan pipes because I love those as well.

This seems to be more like a newsletter or a bulletin – that is how it has come together this week.  As always, I look forward to hearing your comments and any suggestions because I enjoy learning about new things.


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