Archive for September, 2013

Moving Forward

September 29, 2013

It feels as if in some ways I am running in place, not sure what direction to go that works for me.  I have made a lot of changes in the last few years, mostly on the inside; it’s time for me to choose my own direction and what I want to do.  Monday Soul card reading had this card that hit me in the face:

 from Doreen Virtue’s Healing With The Angels Oracle Cards:

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Freedom:

“You may feel trapped right now by life conditions. By drawing this card, the angels ask you to realize that you are the only jail keeper that ever surfaces in your life.

Whenever you realize you have the power to be free, freedom follows. The next time you begin a sentence with the words, I have to………….., please stop. Ask God and the Angles to give you some alternatives.”

Ain’t that the truth!  I am beginning to see how I have made choices that bring me to this point – not  completely yet – and I have also been reading Neal Walsh.  I started “When Everything Changes, Change Everything” and  I am beginning to see that whatever happens in the Now is overlaid with past events that are similar.  And of course it is more likely negative rather than positive.  I am noticing that I am not reacting as much as I used to do.  I have 2 or 3 times when people have gotten their knickers in a twist about something but I didn’t let it churn me up inside as I usually do.  Often I hear my husband say “Oh S–T” or “Oh no!” quite a bit but I don’t go running over to see what it is – it’s usually something minor.  Last night he couldn’t get the dishwasher door to close, so his conclusion was we would have to wash the dishes by hand.  I went out and checked, found the upper utensil basket wasn’t on right – once I shifted it, it all ran smoothly.

I will admit to wanting to fix something right away, yet sometimes it turns out it wasn’t necessary or something else came out of it.  I don’t seem to get in such a panic the way I used to, I learning to be calm and see it more objectively.  Not always, I still have my “knickers in a twist” moments, just fewer as I change my choice of how I think about things.

I am working on this in regard to Mom and visiting her.  She is mumbling more and more and I get a bit antsy to be sure I give the “right” answer.

 I went to see Mom on her birthday on Tuesday – she enjoys the maple sugar candy very much.  Since I was fairly late in the morning because I had to do my infusion, she was a bit sleepy and not too with it.  I brought her Candy’s gifts – I left the chocolate at home and just bring a couple of pieces at a time.  I had a purple  sweatsuit with embroidery that should also keep her warm as well as Candy’s 2 tops.  One Sunday Delores brought over a large pot plant – a yellow and red mum which I also took on Tuesday.
     Since it was a short visit, I went back on Wednesday morning after breakfast club and spent more time with her, reading more of Candy’s book.  Not sure what goes in and sticks, but she seems to like to hear it.  Also, Ellen’s roses had arrived – a dozen roses in wonderful colors.  I brought more chocolate and some cookies for her as well.  Then I went to see her this morning, brought chocolate and read up to the last page I copied at the library, about page 74 or so.  I need to go back to the library and print more the continue reading to her.  I bought cookies for the house – there has been a lot of changes to the cast of characters.  Jan has gone and I noticed Wendall is gone now too.  The only original one is Monique.  Judy definitely has her hands full with the new group.
    As for Mom, she seems  pretty much the same, though when she talks, only the first 3 or 4 words are recognizable and I notice now she will repeat a word several times.  I don’t understand so I just look for a matter of fact way to respond.  I noticed today I had to put the chocolate in her hand, the cookies I brought for house, I gave her one of each, but I had to put it very close to her hand for her to feel it.  The minute she finishes the cookie or the chocolate, she doesn’t remember she had it.   I talked to Denise at the Center when I took Mom for her haircut – she thinks Mom could go on for another 2 years.
       I talked to Dr. Myre the other week, she wanted to know how I felt about Mom’s treatment and if there was anything I was concerned about.  Strangely, when she gave Mom her check up, Mom was cooperative – that is a good change.  I told I was concerned about Mom’s knees because she has been having pain there which makes walking more difficult.  It also makes her less willing to move.  She decided to give Mom some  Tylenol 3 times a day and Judy says it is helping.  I think the other meds are kicking in and helping her to sleep.  I have been going in the morning because after lunch Mom is ready for a nap.
       Life has gotten very busy the last few weeks, 7 clients have wanted things and I am still working on things for 3 of them.  All the other orders have gone in and the USB drives were delivered before the event, the new Museum of Flight volunteer pins are due to arrive today.  Still working on the calendars, one just had the proof approved so it can go into production and Kristen is working on the other.  On top of all that I have been taking pictures of things for the blog as well as creating a new newsletter for Eddie at Apple.  Plus whatever I need to do for Mom.  I feel as though I have been running from here to there and am amazed that I have the energy to do it.  I will say, at this point I have worn myself down and am working on resting and making sure I take care of myself.

. . . . . . . . And Back Again

September 22, 2013

I promised this post would be continued.

When I got out of the car, my friend Patti was there.  I was going to pick her up, then I had to be back here by 2 so we just came in separate cars.  I brought my wheely walker with me, I need somewhere to sit at certain points.  We went up to the 5th floor to check out where the breakfast was, plus I had to register.  Unfortunately they couldn’t find me, but Thea figured out what was happening and gave me my badge holder and breakfast ticket.  They don’t have kitchen facilities at that particular location, so they asked that we each use only one plate for everything.  They gave us quite a good breakfast and there were some awards given as well.  The fashion show was about some of the apparel from several suppliers to give us an idea of what is new.

The breakfast was supposed to be until 10:15, then the Showcase started at 10:30 – they finished at 9;30 which gave us an hour to wait.  Patti and I made sure we used the facilities before going on the show floor.  I also brought my wheely crate – I am my own traffic jam.  This time I hung the tote bag from Bagmakers on one handle of the walker and my purse on the other – my crate I kept folded up and on the seat of the walker and catalogs on top.  There were four aisles with booths on each side – I found I had to have a sit down at the end of each aisle.

I had a couple of clients I was looking for things and ideas.  I realize now I would have smarter to have a notebook to write down the ideas and from what supplier so I would remember them.  I noticed people doing that and wished I had thought of it.  By then I was halfway through and had already couldn’t quite remember which booth I found what or what ideas.  I learn something new each time to make my time more valuable and efficient.   In some ways I feel as though I have been away for a long time and I am now starting over in some ways.

I saw familiar faces and met some new suppliers as well as  distributors I know.  I don’t see as many familiar distributors the past few Showcases.  I ended up with a lot of catalogs and samples, plus some are being sent.   It’s one of those times when the eyes glaze over and the mind goes into neutral.  I did better this time and although I was tired at the end, I went up and down all the aisles and found it was about 2:30.  Turns out my appointment with Brigh for 2 was moved to 4, then moved to Thursday and  finally cancelled because I wasn’t ready to have things sell.  when Alyssa comes, she will have cash and want to buy on the spot.  Monday I will call to get this show on the road.

For three or four nights I looked through my catalogs – halfway through it hit me that I need to put a sticky note on things I wanted to remember.  Usually things sit for a while until I feel rested enough.  Thursday I went to Apple for the group training – Eddie’s newsletter is ready for him and he started with some stories, that meant I had something show and see if I needed to make any changes.  I had time so I started working on my book – I had to start from scratch because my book is on this computer, not Eddie’s lap top.  I put it on a USB drive I got at the show and I will use that when I go on Thursday.  Yesterday Eddie was working on his newsletter and was frustrated –  it’s not the template, it’s Eddie.  He isn’t great at typing and wants everything work perfectly all the time.  I told him not to worry about it, I can fix it later.  He is already wanting to put pictures in but that is the last things to do.

When I came home from Apple, I started taking pictures of things – jewelry, dishes, furniture, etc. and then uploading.  I haven’t really put any description, just pictures.  Seems as if that is all I have been doing for several afternoons.  It takes longer than I thought, but I have put a lot on the blog.  Who knows what I will find when they come to help clean out and price.  I saw Mom on Friday and read some more of Candy’s book – she started to fall asleep after about 30 to 45 minutes.  Actually, she was fast asleep when I came that morning.  Then home for more pictures and uploading.  I will admit to starting to feel I was really beginning to slow down.  Thank goodness I have been sleeping pretty well.

Luzma has been busy in our yard – she is a whirling dervish with her weed whacker.  She did along the drive and up the side of the garage, then the overgrown bed where the rose bushes were by the garage and now she is working her way up under the two cherry trees and around the fig tree.  I don’t know if is part of her grieving process for her cat Lady – they found her dead and it looks as if something living in the canyon was too much for her.  Eddie keeps telling her she doesn’t have to do it, but she seems to want to do it.  She even told me she dreams at night about it and how beautiful it will be.  We are blessed with great neighbors on each side of us.  The Allen’s on the other side are planning to pave their drive again and wondered if we wanted to do it as well.  So we need to get an estimate from them – John and Luzma first said they were interested but now they aren’t.   I just take it as it comes.

It will be interesting to see what happens this coming week.

Running From Here To There. . . . . . .

September 22, 2013

It looks as though I have more energy that I realized – or is it that feeling of close deadlines and no time to dawdle around?  I’ve decided it is a combination of both.  I think the meds are slowly kicking in plus I have been doing some Youtube chakra clearing and other videos.  I read somewhere that having hot lemon water first thing in the morning is beneficial, so last week I was able to combine that with Youtube meditations before starting the day.  Now, if I can work it so I go straight to sleep when the light goes out and get up at 6 every morning so I have that first hour for lemon water and meditation, I’d have it made.  Baby steps so far.

I feel as if I have been  going several places a day or doing something for the past week or more.  I finally found someone to check out the furniture, etc. and he also does house sales.  I would like to have found him earlier since this is the best month to do a sale and to have fairly good weather.   Then I would have had more time to go through stuff and see what my sisters want.  I have been taking pictures of furniture, jewelry, dishes, etc. and putting them on a new blog – just what I need, another blog – so my sisters can see what I have found.  Unfortunately it is such a rush and I feel a bit badly about pushing so hard.  I have been in limbo for the past year and it is long past time for us to move forward with our lives.  I feel as if I have been taking care of everyone else’s affairs while mine are on hold.

Monday last week I had my chiro appointment, stopped at the library to download some of Candy’s new book, then stopped at Burien Press to give Brigh a coffee gift card for coming out to the house the Friday before to check out what we have to sell without his usual fee.   Then I went home to create the new blog,  which took me longer than I planned.   Then Tuesday morning I had a doctor’s appointment with my primary care doc.  He was pleased with me and doesn’t want to see me for 3 months – must mean I am doing well.  Right after that I went to visit Mom.  I took some of the pages of the book to read to Mom, plus bring her cookies.  I read the first 20 pages or so aloud to her and later found Judy had been listening as well.   Mom was alert for most of the time, then she started closing her eyes.

On Tuesday afternoon I was going to the pro D in the afternoon for the NWPMA Showcase – they do education the first day, then the Showcase with suppliers the 2nd day.  I was all set to go when I found out Ami Simms was going to be in Seattle for a few hours and she was looking for lunch companions.  Charlotte offered to pick her up at the airport and then another lady named Becky was interested.  I saw it on Facebook the week before and put in my 2 cents worth.  So after I saw Mom, I met Char and Becky at Southcenter and we drove to the cell phone lot at the airport to wait for Ami to call.

Ami is a well known quilter and create all kinds of patterns and techniques.  Back when I lived in Bethlehem, I took a class based on her book about photo to fabric – I made a hanging with pictures of my cat Muffet.  I have enjoyed Ami’s blog and so for me it was a real treat.  I wanted to do Pro D as well, but I wanted to meet Ami more.  We had a little trouble finding her at baggage claim because we were at Delta and she was at Alaska.  Becky went to check inside and then Charlotte called Ami and found she was walking towards us.  I got out and went to meet her and I saw her coming.  We hugged and I showed her where Char was parked.  Then I went into baggage claim to find Becky but didn’t see her.  when I came out, Char said Becky had called and she arrived at the car when I did but from the opposite direction.

We went over to Southcenter and went to a Pho shop I had gone a while back.  We all had the soup and we all enjoyed it very much.  Ami is such a delight, the minute I met her, I felt I had known her for a long time.  She is very down to earth and genuine, so easy to be with.  We all had a wonderful time, talking, laughing and generally enjoying our time together.  I think they all felt the same way I did, I was sorry when it was over.  Ami had been in Alaska doing a class and had gotten up very early that morning.   She had a 10 hour layover before she was finally able to fly home to Michigan I think.  After lunch she was ready to  wind down and relax before her flight.

Wednesday was Showcase day.  First there was the breakfast at 8:30, then a fashion show before the Showcase itself opened.  They held it at the Tacoma Convention Center – very modern building and I think it is fairly new.  I wasn’t sure where the A parking lot was – the accessible one – plus my other trips down that way often included a lot of traffic.  So I was there very early, although I had to go round the block 2 or 3 times to find the garage entrance for the A section.

To be continued.

They’re Back!!!!!!!

September 15, 2013

It seems our little furry friends have returned.  Remember this face – one only a mother could love?

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Back last February Delores next door was battling moles in our lawn very diligently.  She and Bob went on their annual trip to Hawaii in March and no moles showed up to drive her crazy when she came home.  So things have been quiet – until 2 weeks ago.  Eddie found mole piles in the bed by the garage and now the flowerbed by the back porch.  We also have weeds coming up no matter what we do.

I thought the moles were gone, but they only were off somewhere on their summer holidays.  Now it is back to work, no more frolicking in other places.  Too bad they didn’t decide to move there, there are several who would have happily wished them Bon Voyage with hoopla, knowing they would not return.  They and Mother Nature had other plans.

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This is by the back porch – my toe is in the picture.  They seem to like the new mulch better than the grass.

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They have been quite busy lately, not satisfied with one mound, they do several at a time.  Who knows, maybe it is triplets just learning the trade under Mom and Pop’s training.

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I wonder if this one was made by Pop, the head of the clan.  He must be a big bugger.

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The one on the left was the first one, and I think Eddie took the shovel and hit it, or maybe just stomped it so it was level again.  The one beside it is a little newer.

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Looks like Pop has been at it again – no flowerbed left behind.  This is along the garage and the cement path – I had to take pictures before Eddie took care of them.

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This is what happened when the latest incarnation of Mr. Dinh did when he mowed the dandelions and edged the walk.

Hmmmm, maybe I should  take a few pictures of “after” since I already have “before”.  No story is complete without a beginning and ending.

They have predicted thunder storms today – so far just thunder and lightning but I am not going out to take pictures and get wet.  That is for another day.  Instead, I found this one on Tracey Warren’s Facebook page and loved it – I was chuckling over it for quite a while.  I think it’s the best way to end this blog.

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English Muffins and Orange Marmalade

September 8, 2013

We bought english muffins the other day when Eddie grilled big mushrooms for dinner and we ate them like hamburgers.  Then we had some with toasted cheese with our soup and yesterday morning I had the last one for breakfast.  You may be wondering why I am writing a post about them – here’s the reason.

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English muffin and orange marmalade always makes me think of Eddie when I first met him and my Aunt and Uncle who introduced me to him.  I had been invited down for a 2 week holiday by them between finishing my second year of commercial art school and before I went to work for Boeing.  I can see their kitchen in my mind now and every morning for breakfast they would have coffee, fresh squeezed orange juice along with english muffin and orange marmalade – but not just any kind.  The muffins were always Thomas’ muffins and the marmalade was King Kelly.   I was never able to find it when I lived in the Eastern half of the country, I had to take some with me from my visits here or my California trips.

It was a special time in my life, I had fun with my Aunt and went with her as she was helping out with wedding plans for the young people in her life.  She had two sins and then kind of adopted Elle from Ireland and Bill – not sure where.  Eddie was good friends with my cousin Rob, the younger son who was also going to San Mateo Junior College.  When I arrived for my holiday, Eddie was an established part of the family.

Eddie and my Aunt met at the Red Cross doing the Charleston – Eddie was part of the Foreign Student Club and the Red Cross helped them a lot.  My Aunt was a volunteer – not sure how the Charleston came into it.  My aunt took Eddie under her wing and since he would look for room and board with a family in exchange for help around the house, she found him a place with her neighbor in back.  My Uncle also helped him a lot, plus he was invited to parties and family gatherings.

During my holiday I stayed in Bill’s old room, over the garage.  I can see that in mind as well.  I had visited  them with my family 2 or 3 times when I was growing up, but this trip was different, it was just me.  I had a project from my Dad, to copy my grandmother’s diary since my aunt wouldn’t let it out of the house even to be copied.  I also went with her on her errands and visiting, I enjoyed the drive through Hillsborough and looking at all the fancy houses.

I met Eddie about 2 days after I arrived – he came one evening to talk to my Uncle and before he went upstairs, he sat in the living room with my aunt and me.  I felt such an idiot, so when he came back downstairs and asked me out for ice cream, my jar hit the floor, I was so surprised.  So we went out quite a few times, even went to Sacramento for his class there.  I remember going to the Immigration office – he had to spend a lot of time there and had gotten to know a lot of people who worked there.  He not only went for his own stuff, but also to help new foreign students when they arrived.  Even so, there was still a lot of bureaucratic balderdash.

I remember driving around Hillsborough and the back way to San Mateo with him on our dates.  When I went by the golf course surrounded by huge eucalyptus trees, I thought about taking Max the dog out for a walk with my aunt to the course.  There were eucalyptus trees all over the place, something we don’t have in Washington.  My aunt had a lemon tree in her back yard, she always had fresh lemons.  Something else we don’t have here.

On the side of the house she had a lovely patio with a huge tree to shade it.  We would often have lunch outside there or I would just go sit and relax there.  I read the books she had and it was an enjoyable holiday.  So much so, I stayed an extra week, mostly because of Eddie.  He asked me out for most nights – it was painful for him because he would shave a second time that day and I am sure it must have burned every time after a while.  I didn’t realize that until quite awhile later.

When we came back from Australia, we lived in the Bay Area for 3 years and it continued to feel special to me because every where I went, there was a place Eddie took me or we drove by or something we would do.  We also made a lot of new memories as a married couple and also everywhere we went to live.  The memories here of my Mom and Dad, my two sisters and the wonderful times we shared all through the years.  I also would do English muffins and marmalade quite often and it would take me back to ay aunt’s kitchen in 1968.

Now you know why I wrote about English muffins and orange marmalade – it still gives me those wonderful memories of a time that truly changed my life.

The 2nd Day

September 1, 2013

I planned to write this on Monday or Tuesday, amazing how things get away from me.  I had two order from clients and 3 others I am working on – I don’t remember a time when I had this many projects.  That’s where I have spent my time as well and creating the design for Eddie’s Round Up.  Then seeing Mom twice a week, doc and infusion morning Thursday and meeting a client for lunch afterwards to sign the order form.

I was telling my rheumatologist about last Saturday at the Tournament and how pleased to find the after effects weren’t very bad.  I have noticed over the years that when I have done something major (sometimes not having done anything at all) I find the day after is often pretty good – I have even had ones that were wonderful.  But there is something about the 2nd day that I have been known to crash, to be stiff, sore and miserable.  What is it about that 2nd day?  Maybe lactic acid has built up in my muscles.  What I do know is I have to wait to see how I am 2 days after the event to see how well I am doing.

I was pleased to find I was doing  pretty well Sunday – well enough to start trimming the little forsythia by the ding room window.  It had been trimmed when John and his crew took out the wisteria, sticker bush  and a few other things.  It has since sent out long branches that got to a point that I couldn’t see out the window very well.  I was careful where I stepped and did quite well, though the lower back wasn’t all that happy.  Eddie came out a little later with the big clippers for the thicker branches – together we did a good job of trimming it back.

Monday was the 2nd day and I was doing rather well.    A little stiff and sore, good thing I had an adjustment with Cheryl and a massage with Debye that day.  So I did well after seeing the two of them and just had to see how the 2nd day of the forsythia trimming would go the next day.  I was pretty good, a bit stiff in the shoulders but otherwise better than I hoped.

I remember the last weekend of Ike Pono, Saturday was Warrior Games.  I knew I had a choice to participate or just use RA as an excuse not to do anything.  I decided it was go full tilt or nothing and deal with any consequences afterwards.  I went full tilt and I was stiff and sore the next day – it does happen that way sometimes.  I was a little late on Sunday and not moving too well – I explained I decided to go full tilt and deal with repercussions later.  I had a really nice compliment from Bruce – he told me “You are someone I want in my fox hole because I know you will have my back”.

The most frustrating time is when I haven’t really done much, just taking care of myself and suddenly I am hurting and miserable.  What happened?  Did I do something?  I will admit I have not quite figured it out yet.  I do remember the first summer I was in New Jersey – my first experience with humidity.  We did have a couple of window air conditioners so it wasn’t too bad, but I was still uncomfortable.  Then in September it cooled down and was very pleasant and comfortable.  Then the 1st of October it suddenly went humid again and I felt as if I had been run over by a train.  A clue that RA and humidity don’t get along very well in my body.

I can look back now and see it in a slightly different light and wonder – what was I focusing on and was it just one of my oh-poor-me-osis times or was there actually a trigger that put all that in motion?  It is certainly easier to look back than to be in the moment feeling everything and wondering what  I did wrong.  I suspect I will continue to wonder how what I do will feel on the 2nd day, but look at it a little differently, maybe with curiosity, interest and wonder rather than feeling a victim and someone or something is out to get me.

My rheumatologist was pleased with me on thursday, my sed rate was down 2 points and I am feeling better.  Still waiting for the surge of energy, but my joints seem to be doing better and since the sed rate is down, I will go for my infusion in 4 weeks but not see her until the following one 8 weeks later.  Any time the doc spreads out the time between appointments, I know I am doing well.

These pictures have nothing to do with topic, I just thought they were adorable.  Candy took them at Lake Radnor – such a variety of things and animals to see there.

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I think this was taken in the Spring not too long after the birth.

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They are so well camouflaged you would have to be up close to see them.

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Such an adorable face!

Thank you so much Candy, they are a pleasure to see.


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