Posts Tagged ‘haircut’

The Rest of The Story

October 5, 2014

I didn’t write my sisters about Wednesday until the next day – I needed to digest it for a bit first.  I also needed to meet Mom at the Center to take her for a haircut.  Last time she was fast asleep through all of it, not this time.  She was sleepy and holding on to her plush lion, but she was a bit more with it.

Lisa put the plastic shield around Mom and the lion so Mom would have something to hold.  She wasn’t all that happy about having it washed, I had to put a towel around her forehead because the headpiece let water run down into her face.  She didn’t like the shampoo – at one point tried to bite Lisa.  Unfortunately she wasn’t able to really get her hair clean because Mom was so feisty.  She cut Mom’s hair and then put her under the dryer to dry it as much as she could.  Mom was not happy under the dryer, I was sitting next to her and put my hand on her arm and let it know it was all right.  Then she held my hand while the dryer was going, at times she got agitated and I just told her it’s fine.

Lisa fluffed her hair some – interesting to see the back curly and the front very straight.  She said it happens with geriatric patients, some parts will curl, others won’t.  Certainly Mom was glad it was over.  I took her back upstairs to get ready for lunch.

I asked Sherry, the receptionist, if it was possible to see Dr. Myre, I wanted to collect my hug.  Instead of phoning, she must have written an email because Dr. Myre came out quite quickly.  Not only did I get one hug, I had several strong ones from her.  She  is very comforting and understanding – I, of course got teary and drippy.  Seems to be the case a lot lately.  She said I was doing a great job being there for my Mom and it helped to hear that.  Many of my friends and my sisters have continually told me that – it is good to hear since the old “beat myself up” program keeps intruding.  It says I haven’t done it perfectly and not done all I could – that voice will always tell me I didn’t do it perfectly or enough.  So I am learning to  release the need for that and to know I am enough.

I left and went to see my acupuncturist because I felt the sore, scratchy throat starting again. Probably would have been smart to go Tuesday and nip it in the bud.  I made an appointment for Friday as well.  Seems as if lately everything is coming at once, with not much time in between to regain my balance.  I’m not sure it is supposed to come in separate intervals.  When I worked in department store, it was either everyone came at once or it was very quiet.

Friday I went to visit Mom, I wondered if she would be wiped out after the haircut.  She was fast asleep in ned, holding on to the weighted baby doll Char gave to Mom.  Judy said she likes to have something to hold, keeps her hands occupied.  I didn’t want to wake her up, but I did tell her I love her and that Ellen and Candy send their love.  I knew I would get too teary if I stayed much longer, so I left and headed over for my acupuncture appointment.

It’s been an odd week, Eddie was home Wednesday because the archives were closed and he wanted to get another shirt from the Car Museum.  I went to Breakfast Club, then came home because I had to work on an order for calculators.  He assumed I would come with him and seemed a disappointed I didn’t.  The Friday he had the day off because he was going to go to the venue for the PNAA Defense Conference to show Lisa the layout.  I  didn’t get home until after 1, he wanted to know what kept me.  Trouble is, he assumes when he takes a day off, I am available to play.  I usually have been but now with new things going on, it isn’t possible and he has to adjust.  Funny how things change, then change again.

We also have been sleeping in separate rooms for the past 3 weeks or so.  He had a bad cold and didn’t want to give it to me, then I had the coming down with something – neither wanted to give it to the other.  Friday we finally got together again, though we are being careful because we don’t really know if either of us is contagious or not.

I also wrote an email to the Northwest Schooner Society to see if they were interested in the models and Dad’s old wood working tools.  I had a nice email and Kitty wrote back saying they would be very interested.  I email pictures and she said they were gorgeous.  So now we are working on a day for her and her helpers to come and pick things up. I told her the box may be a bit heavy, that I would check with my next door neighbor to see if they would be around to help.  They are a young, just married couple living in the lower level of Bob and Delores’s house – Cameron is their grandson – I think their son Jerry’s son – and his wife Kika.  We saw them last night – they were locked out and came for the key – and they are willing, it just depends on when.

Plus my radio show – I have 2 guests lined up and working on a third.  Still no sponsors but I have given a couple of people the information.  I am getting ready to publish my website for the show – it will be rough and needs refining.

Otherwise, not much has been happening here.

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A Mom Day

August 20, 2014

I would have written this yesterday afternoon but I was exhausted.  I had gone to visit Mom on Monday for a regular visit – she was rather sleepy and only ate the chocolate.  Elaine said she had made french toast for breakfast and I suspect that was shortly before I came.  I read and finished the book, putting her to sleep.  She was all that alert, so I didn’t stay long.  I left the cookies for an afternoon snack later.

Yesterday I had made an appointment for Mom to have her haircut at the Center.  I will admit I was not sure how much she would fight it.  I went to the Center and there was Mom, fast asleep in the wheelchair.  I took her down and she slept through it all.  Lisa cut her hair first, then shampooed it and blew it dry.  Lisa figured Mom would wake up once she started shampooing, but she didn’t.  I held Mom’s head up a bit to make sure the water wouldn’t run down her face.  Her hair looked so much better when Lisa was done, it had gotten so long.  She is now on a 6 week rotation to have her hair cut, I want to make sure it is done on a regular schedule.

By the time she was finished, it was noon and time for lunch.  It also turned out she had a check up with the doctor that day as well – how do I manage schedule a haircut the day she is to see the doc?  Anyway, I had some time on my own until the doctor.  So I went down to the small gift shop to wander around, then went to the car for my book.  There is a small cafe just down the hall, I had half a sandwich and a bottle of lemonade – boy, was I thirsty!  I read and while I had lunch and was able to regroup for the doctor’s visit.

I went up about 1:15, Mom had woken up and was awake long enough to eat a good lunch.  Then she was back asleep in the examine chair.  They also noticed she tends to list to the left, something they really hadn’t seen before – she does that in the chair when I go to see her.  She got very feisty with them when the doc and the nurse were examine her.  She was mostly asleep, but fought with them when they were checking to be sure her skin is in good condition, all around her abdomen, checked the lump, didn’t do too well looking in her eyes.  There was one point when she fought and said “Stop it, God Damn it!.  Not what one expects Mom to say.  Definitely the dementia doing its thing.

It was so hard to see her in that situation and how strong she still is – the doc and nurse were being as gentle as they could but it looked worse than it was.  It was upsetting and at times as I was answering questions, I found myself getting weepy as I told them what they wanted to know.  I said I notice now she mumbles more, not distinct words that rhyme that she repeats.  The lump has not become any smaller, nor will it; so she said they want to just keep an eye on it so it doesn’t get any bigger.  On the whole, they are pleased she is doing as well as she is.

When I had first come in, I saw Denise, the social worker who helped me so much.  A few months ago she asked if it would be all right to have a woman who used to work Traveler’s Aid come visit Mom.  I said “Of course!”.  Last week Jane came by to visit Mom and she talked to Mom about the orphan meets and Mom lighted up and actually spoke the words Airport, Babies and happy.  She smiled and was holding a stuffed animal, so was Jane – they showed each other their baby.  It was a small slice of a happy time.  I am  pleased it worked out so well.

The past three days have been  a lot of ups and downs, the downs have been mostly with Mom and I found myself out of sorts and cranky when I woke up this morning. Part of it was from a dream about Eddie, he had moved everything around in the kitchen, we had guests and I had no idea what house we were in or where anything was.  I couldn’t fix anything to eat for people, had no idea who they were and sometimes I think I had very few clothes on.  So it has been a weird day.

We have a new tax  man and we have seen him every Wednesday for the past 3 weeks.  We went in to meet him and the following week brought all our tax stuff for the past 3 years.  We figured the next time would be when we came to do the taxes – no such luck.  The IRS and Social Security sent us another letter about the 2 months when we hired Kathy while I was in rehab.  We have paid the money but somewhere it hasn’t come together, but he found the problem and had it put together in half an hour – ready to send off.  let’s hope it is the end of it.

this whole Mom situation has been a really education and learning experience – I wonder if I am expecting myself to do it perfectly.  The doc thinks I am doing a really good job, the caregivers think so – I have gotten a lot of positive comments.  I’m doing the best I can and that is as perfect as it will ever be.


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