Posts Tagged ‘feisty’

A Mom Day

August 20, 2014

I would have written this yesterday afternoon but I was exhausted.  I had gone to visit Mom on Monday for a regular visit – she was rather sleepy and only ate the chocolate.  Elaine said she had made french toast for breakfast and I suspect that was shortly before I came.  I read and finished the book, putting her to sleep.  She was all that alert, so I didn’t stay long.  I left the cookies for an afternoon snack later.

Yesterday I had made an appointment for Mom to have her haircut at the Center.  I will admit I was not sure how much she would fight it.  I went to the Center and there was Mom, fast asleep in the wheelchair.  I took her down and she slept through it all.  Lisa cut her hair first, then shampooed it and blew it dry.  Lisa figured Mom would wake up once she started shampooing, but she didn’t.  I held Mom’s head up a bit to make sure the water wouldn’t run down her face.  Her hair looked so much better when Lisa was done, it had gotten so long.  She is now on a 6 week rotation to have her hair cut, I want to make sure it is done on a regular schedule.

By the time she was finished, it was noon and time for lunch.  It also turned out she had a check up with the doctor that day as well – how do I manage schedule a haircut the day she is to see the doc?  Anyway, I had some time on my own until the doctor.  So I went down to the small gift shop to wander around, then went to the car for my book.  There is a small cafe just down the hall, I had half a sandwich and a bottle of lemonade – boy, was I thirsty!  I read and while I had lunch and was able to regroup for the doctor’s visit.

I went up about 1:15, Mom had woken up and was awake long enough to eat a good lunch.  Then she was back asleep in the examine chair.  They also noticed she tends to list to the left, something they really hadn’t seen before – she does that in the chair when I go to see her.  She got very feisty with them when the doc and the nurse were examine her.  She was mostly asleep, but fought with them when they were checking to be sure her skin is in good condition, all around her abdomen, checked the lump, didn’t do too well looking in her eyes.  There was one point when she fought and said “Stop it, God Damn it!.  Not what one expects Mom to say.  Definitely the dementia doing its thing.

It was so hard to see her in that situation and how strong she still is – the doc and nurse were being as gentle as they could but it looked worse than it was.  It was upsetting and at times as I was answering questions, I found myself getting weepy as I told them what they wanted to know.  I said I notice now she mumbles more, not distinct words that rhyme that she repeats.  The lump has not become any smaller, nor will it; so she said they want to just keep an eye on it so it doesn’t get any bigger.  On the whole, they are pleased she is doing as well as she is.

When I had first come in, I saw Denise, the social worker who helped me so much.  A few months ago she asked if it would be all right to have a woman who used to work Traveler’s Aid come visit Mom.  I said “Of course!”.  Last week Jane came by to visit Mom and she talked to Mom about the orphan meets and Mom lighted up and actually spoke the words Airport, Babies and happy.  She smiled and was holding a stuffed animal, so was Jane – they showed each other their baby.  It was a small slice of a happy time.  I am  pleased it worked out so well.

The past three days have been  a lot of ups and downs, the downs have been mostly with Mom and I found myself out of sorts and cranky when I woke up this morning. Part of it was from a dream about Eddie, he had moved everything around in the kitchen, we had guests and I had no idea what house we were in or where anything was.  I couldn’t fix anything to eat for people, had no idea who they were and sometimes I think I had very few clothes on.  So it has been a weird day.

We have a new tax  man and we have seen him every Wednesday for the past 3 weeks.  We went in to meet him and the following week brought all our tax stuff for the past 3 years.  We figured the next time would be when we came to do the taxes – no such luck.  The IRS and Social Security sent us another letter about the 2 months when we hired Kathy while I was in rehab.  We have paid the money but somewhere it hasn’t come together, but he found the problem and had it put together in half an hour – ready to send off.  let’s hope it is the end of it.

this whole Mom situation has been a really education and learning experience – I wonder if I am expecting myself to do it perfectly.  The doc thinks I am doing a really good job, the caregivers think so – I have gotten a lot of positive comments.  I’m doing the best I can and that is as perfect as it will ever be.

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Back to the Warm Stuff!

July 29, 2014

I know we don’t have very hot weather compared to a lot of places – I spent a lot of time living in the Eastern half of the country so I know hot and humid.  I don’t do that well with hot weather and when I found central air conditioning, I knew I had found the solution to being comfortable at home.  Then it was only going out somewhere that was very uncomfortable.  Plus I never knew how cold the air conditioning would be in shops, restaurants or hotels.  it would be cold inside the grocery sore and coming outside to the heat and humidity was as if I had been hit by a wet gauze curtain.

As a result, I am so happy to be back here in Seattle, not only the weather but also a large body of salt water and proper mountains.  Yes, I am probably a wuss, but I like to be comfortable. Our idea of hot weather is different.  We were close to 90 yesterday and will no doubt be about that again today – glad to have a day to myself at home with the windows open and the furnace fan circulating air from one floor to another.  It definitely makes sleeping at night more comfortable.   We have lovely breezes but for some reason they die down after dark – just when we need the cool air.  That’s why I am glad I checked out the fan so we could have the breeze whether Mother Nature sent it or not.

I went to visit Mom yesterday morning – she was very feisty and grumpy.  She didn’t want anyone to touch her – even me.  So I said “Not even your daughter Elizabeth’?  She wasn’t sure who I was, so I gave chocolate and cookies which she enjoyed and read for a bit.  I asked if she would like a back rub, but that wasn’t accepted.  I was surprised to find I wasn’t really upset because it isn’t the first time.  I suspect as time goes on she will know me less and less.  I find I have to put the chocolate or cookie in her hand – Didi says someone has to be with her at mealtime to redirect her when she gets distracted.  I know she will slowly forget how to do the things she can do right now.

Fern – who is 102 – was at the table and she seems to enjoy hearing the book even when I put Mom to sleep.  I’m glad I can do something to entertain her, it is so hard for her because she thinks no one ever comes to visit.  Her son and his family do come, but it is in the evening after work.  Didi now has an opening because Monique left – she was a bit in another world but when she got on the bus and made it all the way to SeaTac, that was a big problem.  As far as I know Monique went to hospital but not sure what happened after that.

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I have most of the blueberry bushes covered

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The two branches that need tying up

The blueberries are ripening and the birds are having a field day.  There is a huge Stellard Blue Jay eating his fill.  On the way home yesterday, I stopped at Joann’s for nylon net.  I bought 2 3 yard pieces and sewed them together – unfortunately the blueberries extend farther than I thought.  So I need to make another trip for more and also some clips to hold it together.  They will get under the net anyway, but it will be a little harder.

Eddie picked some ripe ones last night and they were wonderful  He also found a ripe fig on the tree, so we split it – out of this world!  The apples are starting fall on the ground, probably time to check out the pears to see if any are ready to pick.  I didn’t realize pears are picked unripe and then they are left to ripen.  If they stay on the tree, they may rot.  The red ones are doing well, don’t think we have many on the other pear tree.

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How about those pears!


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