Posts Tagged ‘Finding The Gifts’

Update

October 29, 2017

This week was to be the last week for my radio show. I have kept my station manager appraised of what has been happening. I thought I had some sponsors, but they fell through. I do have 2 sponsors but they are not enough to keep the show going. However, my station manager offered me a deal for the last two months so I can finish out the year. The two sponsors would really help with that, so I am going to accept his offer. I have spent the last few weeks working on sponsors, but since things haven’t come together, I have been thinking the Universe has been telling me something – maybe I am not meant to do the show at this point. I decided I had to be truly willing to let it go. This is my baby and I have been a puddle about it – in private – and I need to let it go. Who knows, the Cavalry may come to the rescue at the last minute. I am going to celebrate rather than be sad and mournful about it. I have gained so much and had a lot of fun doing the show – I am blessed to be able to do it for a second time. The station survey will be finish on the 31st of October – I am very curious to see if anyone noticed my show and what they might say. I will take each show and enjoy it, then a new year and new things to create. This show has me working on a book – plus suddenly I have another idea for a book – it needs to simmer on the back burner. Whatever happens at the end of the year, I will be forever grateful and happy about my show. I hope I have been of help to others, it is up to Spirit. I have decided that if I have helped someone quite a lot, I will never know but that is quite all right.  I have been helped a lot myself and appreciate everyone I have been working with and all those out there listening.

What has surprised me is to find I am working on a book based on the things I have been talking about on my show.  Also I have been doing doing 30 day course – except I am halfway through and it has been several months since I started.  It has really made me think and examine things, often I have had to let it simmer on the back burner until it made sense.  That is also part of where the book has come as well.   It is the first time I have had a clear idea what I want to put in the book, how it needs to be organized and there are times I have all kinds of ideas when we turn off the light to go to sleep.  There are many days I can’t wait to get to it and start writing.

I have sent bits of it to a few people and have received wonderful feedback.  So I will be working on the book after the show and what really surprised me is an idea for another book.  That will also simmer on the back burner until it is ready.  Not sure how all this will work or what will happen – I see it as an adventure and will follow it where it leads.

I know I haven’t written much for a while – I don’t think any one wants to hear me whinge about what hurts, what I have been dealing with – just know I am doing better and it is feels so good to be more myself.  (I know, someone will ask “Who have you been?’).  The answer – I don’t have a clue.  Lately I have a new ulcer on my right leg, however they have not wrapped me up much.  I tried putting Cling Film all around it to see if I could take a shower.  It was okay but I am tired of spit baths and I wanted to feel clean and fresh.  I can only do that when it is time to change the bandage.  I will be back at Wound Care on Wednesday.

Next month Eddie is having his first cataract surgery – it is time because he is really noticing it.   They are doing the left eye then 2 weeks later, the right eye.  He wants to do it before the end of the year, there is no telling what will change with Medicare and Medicare Supplement.  I have one developing but so far it is not getting worse.  I also have the beginning of Macular Degeneration – I have been taking Preservision to keep it from progressing.  Getting older certainly isn’t for sissies!

We’re planning to be home for the holidays.  Eddie is having his first surgery two days before Thanksgiving.  We had already decided to be home for that holiday and we will also not be going anywhere for Christmas.  We have definitely become homebodies.

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I Am Official!!!!!!!!

August 29, 2014

I am now officially a radio host for KKNW, Alternative Talk Radio.  I signed a 1 year contract yesterday for a 30 minute talk show on Tuesdays at 9:30.  It will start on September 16th and is called Finding The Gifts.  In some ways it is exciting and also a little unreal.  I have never done this before, it is truly a leap of faith because at the moment I don’t have any sponsors to pay for the air time.  I am feeling calm and at peace at the moment, watching with curiosity as it unfolds.  My show starts on September 16th and it can be heard on the internet, iTunes, 1150kknw.com and you can also download an app for iPad and iPhone.  I don’t think it has quite penetrated that it is heard globally, not just here in Washington and the U.S.

1150 KKNW_logo

I am to meet with the engineer for the show, Benny, in the next couple of weeks to find out how it works in the studio.  I am planning for the first 2 shows at least as a learning experience, seeing how things work the timing, how to break up the time for show and commercials.  A lot to learn but I see it as having fun – better to see those butterflies as excitement rather than fear.  They both feel the same way and I can choose which it will be.

It’s been an interesting week, Tuesday I put a spanner in my own works – I thought I was to see my primary doc this morning and do my infusion on Thursday.  Turns out I mixed them up and still was able to do both.  I was concerned about driving into Seattle to the Polyclinic, the viaduct was closed and I figured people were trying to find ways around.  What a delight to find there wasn’t traffic either going down 4th Ave and later on I-5 south.  It worked out quite well.

Wednesday I picked up Melanie to take her to Breakfast Club – she moved about 2 years ago to Las Vegas and it was a delight to see her.  She makes me laughs, I learn so much from her and we have a great time.  After Breakfast  Club, we went to have coffee and catch up on what each has been doing.  She is edited about my show and has had experience in radio.  Also, if I need guests, she knows a lot of people.  Time went by much too fast, she was having lunch with her stepmother, so I dropped her back at her sister’s at 12:30.  Melanie is such a tonic for me and I had a wonderful time with her.

I had an email from the radio station, they are delighted I am joining the family – I am meeting them on Thursday for all the details and probably signing a year contract.  In some ways it isn’t quite real, in other ways it is.  I told the doc about it and he was pleased for me.   I came home around 1 and was tired.  I had a banana and then Eddie came home and we had some lunch.  Then I had a nap for about 2 or 3 hours – I’m still a bit draggy, so I am hoping a night’s sleep will help.

  I  am working on an update on my business website fivesensespromotions.com – I feel as if I have been floundering try to understand and visualize it.  They sent me a mock-up for the new site but it seemed so bland, yet I could describe what it needed.  Then spent the last few weeks playing email tag with Chris, the designer.  Finally we connected and talked on Friday, makes a big difference to say it than write it.  He suggested I look at other sites for ones I like, so I was checking out website templates on Friday and Sunday.  After a while on Sunday, I was bug-eyed, my mind had gone into neutral and my eyes glazed over.  But I found things that I liked and was ready for him when we talked at noon on Monday.  I felt as if we were on the same wave length and I had a better idea and understanding about the site.
I had bought an app called Wordify that takes a silhouette and makes the shape using the words I type in.  It is fun and I have learned a lot about it – I found that I can click the triangle to Wordify it, then click it again and it is entirely different.  I can do random, so the words are vertical and horizontal, or all horizontal or all vertical.  There are all kinds of fonts, but clicking the box Surprise Me puts the words in all kinds of fonts and sizes.    The I spent a lot of time going bug-eyed looking for photos for the top part of the site when I click on the icons.
Wordify-2014-08-18 20-42-24
 After all the cleaning out last week, I took Saturday off completely.  I find myself sleepy in the afternoon- Saturday I had a nap and felt better when I got up.  I do have a calendar with things I am doing – tomorrow I am going to the radio station to talk about sponsors and how to structure the offers.  Then they will help me with suggestions for approaching possible sponsors.  I have also been thinking a lot about the show, who I would invite as guests as well as working on a website for the show.
I went to see mom Monday and today, she seems quite sleepy a lot of the time.  The meds are to help her anxiety and the doc wants to keep her on them because if they cut back, she will be animus.   She is comfortable as long as no one touches her, when they do, she gets feisty.  Judy told me today that because her knee hurts, she has trouble standing and is reluctant to do it.
This may seem a little disjointed, I feel a bit that way.  A lot of changes are going on for me and also for Eddie, no telling what will happen next.  It is so good

Past My Comfort Zone

July 20, 2014

I have started a new project, though I have been thinking about it and wanting to do it for the past few years.  So why haven’t I done it before now?  Great question!  I think it has mostly been –  what I am beginning to understand finally – a result of my core belief, I am not good enough.  I have seen myself in terms of what I don’t have – a degree, a specific talent, training – I can go on and on.  I was also concerned about who would be interested in what I have to say, that no one would tune in to me.  All those insecurities running around my brain. Strangely enough, about 5 weeks ago I calmly wrote an email:

  I have been wanting to do a radio show, not quite sure how to clearly define it.  I have had Rheumatoid Arthritis for 43 years and in the last few years I have been thinking in terms of finding the gifts in it rather than seeing myself as a victim.  Since February of 2010, I have been writing a blog called www.giftofra.com,
wanting to share my experiences and what I am learning can help others.  I am in the process of writing an ebook with a collection of blog posts about RA – I plan to do one about dementia since I have been dealing with my Mom’s for the past 3 or 4 years.  I have spent most of those 43 years dealing with it on my own and it would have been great to have someone with more experience to consult.  In some way, I would like to be that person – I am only an expert in my own RA.  
      I probably need someone to help me decide the focus and audience for a show – I have been thinking of calling it Finding The Gifts.  It is scary, yet I have been thinking about it the last few years while I have enjoyed listening to KKNW.  There is a part of me that thinks “Why would anyone want to listen to me?”, I know that is the no part of me.  If I don’t actively do something about it, it will always be something I wanted to do but never had the courage.
I had a really nice email in response:
My name is Brian Egge with KKNW.  Erik Krema the Operations Manager at KKNW gave me your contact information.  I am sorry to hear about your condition, but it sounds like you have made the best of it.  I think it’s very admirable that you want to share your experiences with others that may have the same condition and help consult them.  Erik and I would love to hear more about yourself and your condition to see how it will relate to the KKNW audience.
About 2 weeks later I went over to the radian station to meet with Brian and Erik.  It was a lot of  fun and they were terrific.  What has surprised me through this whole thing is how calm I am – I wasn’t worried about my looks even though I am heavier than I have ever been.  I just thought, this is who I am at this moment and I am fine with it.  I didn’t have the butterflies in my stomach or any of that, nor did I feel insecure and see myself as not having much to offer.  They asked questions and I had no problem answering them, plus I put in a few bits myself.
I was amazed when they said I had the timbre and voice for radio – I told them I spent a lot of years answering the phone and having people ask if my mother was there – the timing.  They really wanted me to come and do a show for the station.  All I had to do was tell them when.  Then I got the fluttering inside.  I must admit, I was stunned and it hadn’t really seemed real or sunk in at the point.  WOW!  I had no idea.
Now, the sticking point is getting sponsors to fund the show – no way I can afford it on my own.  I have talked to a couple of friends and they are interested – I just have to understand how it all works.  I told them I would start a list of questions – I always have questions, just ask my clients.  Interestingly enough, I had started a notebook about my radio show 2 or 3 years ago, that made a start for right now.
Later I had another email from Brian:
Thanks for the email.  Well Erik and I really do believe you would be excellent as a radio host on KKNW.  Yes, I would be happy to send you some information to share with your people of interest for sponsoring.  I will put something together and try to email it to you by no later than Monday afternoon.  Does that work?
Does that work?  You bet your ass it does.  This is new territory for me, so it is a bit confusing at the moment.  I want to meet with them again to find out how it all works.  It has finally sunk in and I have been thinking about it and what I would do.  I had some ideas for music I listed in my notebook, then Friday I was listening to my Susan Boyle cd in the car and the last song is “This Is The Moment” and it hit me because it said a lot of things that described how I was feeling.
It is less expensive to do it outside 6 to 6 weekdays, but I have decided to aim high and do half an hour on a weekday – shoot for the moon and I will at least land on a star.  Once again, I need to talk with them about it.  I know there are a lot more things to do, I am working on what I know to do right now and see what comes next.

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