One good place to start is with a couple of adorable pictures from my sister Candy while cat sitting.
Kittyboy Litterfoot (Petey) The Zen Purr Master (Emma)
I have been neglecting this blog for a while because of the kitchen remodel – haven’t been able to let those who like my post how much I appreciate it. I am even more amazed and delighted to find I have almost 60 followers – that means quite a lot to me.
No doubt (or maybe not) you are wondering what I have been doing for the last few weeks. There is my Mom and where she is at this point. I have begun to visit her in the morning, not always easy, because after lunch she is ready for a lie down or a nap. She is a bit more with it in the morning, we have a visit. She is having trouble saying what she wants, she tends to mumble more and more that I don’t really understand it. There are times when she is with it a bit more and I tell her what I have been doing. I haven’t told her about the kitchen remodel, I am not sure what she understands and I wonder if it would agitate her. I tend to go with “If you aren’t sure, don’t”. Maybe I am just chicken.
She is having trouble with arthritis in her knees, one especially. She doesn’t like to walk or move because she knows it will hurt, though some days she is doing well and uses the walker. If it is a bad day, they will have in a wheelchair. They don’t want to make the wheelchair a habit or she will not walk again. Last Wednesday was her evaluation with DSHS – I learned things I didn’t really know – or didn’t want to know. Essentially she needs help with everything, she can wash her face if they give her soap and washcloth ready to go and she can eat by herself but someone needs to be there to keep her on track. Otherwise, she needs help or have it done for her in everything else.
I knew she had to have help with a lot, but I didn’t realize the extent – threw me for a loop. I am still digesting it, I am not sure how I feel about it – I am not sure I feel anything at the moment. I knew it would come to this and she would only go downhill, I am not sure I am ready for it. Looks as if I will have to be ready for it. One thing I have learned recently is to do something after I see Mom, even if it is just to go to Lowes for something for the house. Or wander around somewhere just looking and seeing what’s there. I am working on doing an errand after I see her, though I sometimes forget. Then I go earthing on the Allen’s grass because it is softer and nicer than ours.
She can be very feisty sometimes, not wanting to shower, wash her hair or change her clothes. However, Judy told me when she is having a good day, she is a darling. I know it is the dementia that is causing a lot of this, still hard to see it happen to Mom. My sisters call her, but now it is hard for them and for Mom. I had an email this morning from Candy, she had called Mom the other week and this was how she described it.
” I can tell that Mom is “disappearing” by our phone calls. She managed an “I love you, too” at the last phone call, but mostly it is a couple of minutes of me talking, and any answer she gives is so garbled it makes no sense. I tell her we are all fine. I tell her she’s been a wonderful mother and is free to leave, that we will be all right. I tell her I love her. I’m not sure she really knows who she’s talking to, though it is made clear at the beginning of the conversation that it’s her daughter from Nashville.”
A lot of other things have been going on as well, plenty of things for several posts. I always hesitate to publish things about my Mom, she is a very private person and she might be upset for the whole world to know. Yet I also hope that writing about what is happening for our family can be of help and benefit to others dealing with a similar situation. More early childhood training.
Tags: Candy, dementia, DSHS evaluation, Family, Health, Kitchen, Mother, Nashville, wheelchair
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