Past My Comfort Zone

July 20, 2014

I have started a new project, though I have been thinking about it and wanting to do it for the past few years.  So why haven’t I done it before now?  Great question!  I think it has mostly been –  what I am beginning to understand finally – a result of my core belief, I am not good enough.  I have seen myself in terms of what I don’t have – a degree, a specific talent, training – I can go on and on.  I was also concerned about who would be interested in what I have to say, that no one would tune in to me.  All those insecurities running around my brain. Strangely enough, about 5 weeks ago I calmly wrote an email:

  I have been wanting to do a radio show, not quite sure how to clearly define it.  I have had Rheumatoid Arthritis for 43 years and in the last few years I have been thinking in terms of finding the gifts in it rather than seeing myself as a victim.  Since February of 2010, I have been writing a blog called www.giftofra.com,
wanting to share my experiences and what I am learning can help others.  I am in the process of writing an ebook with a collection of blog posts about RA – I plan to do one about dementia since I have been dealing with my Mom’s for the past 3 or 4 years.  I have spent most of those 43 years dealing with it on my own and it would have been great to have someone with more experience to consult.  In some way, I would like to be that person – I am only an expert in my own RA.  
      I probably need someone to help me decide the focus and audience for a show – I have been thinking of calling it Finding The Gifts.  It is scary, yet I have been thinking about it the last few years while I have enjoyed listening to KKNW.  There is a part of me that thinks “Why would anyone want to listen to me?”, I know that is the no part of me.  If I don’t actively do something about it, it will always be something I wanted to do but never had the courage.
I had a really nice email in response:
My name is Brian Egge with KKNW.  Erik Krema the Operations Manager at KKNW gave me your contact information.  I am sorry to hear about your condition, but it sounds like you have made the best of it.  I think it’s very admirable that you want to share your experiences with others that may have the same condition and help consult them.  Erik and I would love to hear more about yourself and your condition to see how it will relate to the KKNW audience.
About 2 weeks later I went over to the radian station to meet with Brian and Erik.  It was a lot of  fun and they were terrific.  What has surprised me through this whole thing is how calm I am – I wasn’t worried about my looks even though I am heavier than I have ever been.  I just thought, this is who I am at this moment and I am fine with it.  I didn’t have the butterflies in my stomach or any of that, nor did I feel insecure and see myself as not having much to offer.  They asked questions and I had no problem answering them, plus I put in a few bits myself.
I was amazed when they said I had the timbre and voice for radio – I told them I spent a lot of years answering the phone and having people ask if my mother was there – the timing.  They really wanted me to come and do a show for the station.  All I had to do was tell them when.  Then I got the fluttering inside.  I must admit, I was stunned and it hadn’t really seemed real or sunk in at the point.  WOW!  I had no idea.
Now, the sticking point is getting sponsors to fund the show – no way I can afford it on my own.  I have talked to a couple of friends and they are interested – I just have to understand how it all works.  I told them I would start a list of questions – I always have questions, just ask my clients.  Interestingly enough, I had started a notebook about my radio show 2 or 3 years ago, that made a start for right now.
Later I had another email from Brian:
Thanks for the email.  Well Erik and I really do believe you would be excellent as a radio host on KKNW.  Yes, I would be happy to send you some information to share with your people of interest for sponsoring.  I will put something together and try to email it to you by no later than Monday afternoon.  Does that work?
Does that work?  You bet your ass it does.  This is new territory for me, so it is a bit confusing at the moment.  I want to meet with them again to find out how it all works.  It has finally sunk in and I have been thinking about it and what I would do.  I had some ideas for music I listed in my notebook, then Friday I was listening to my Susan Boyle cd in the car and the last song is “This Is The Moment” and it hit me because it said a lot of things that described how I was feeling.
It is less expensive to do it outside 6 to 6 weekdays, but I have decided to aim high and do half an hour on a weekday – shoot for the moon and I will at least land on a star.  Once again, I need to talk with them about it.  I know there are a lot more things to do, I am working on what I know to do right now and see what comes next.

Last Part of The Song

July 13, 2014

I decided to  finish up the last 2 verses of  “My Favorite Things”.   If Ellen and Candy have any photos to contribute, then I will redo it.

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Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes

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Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes

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Silver white winters that melt into springs

These are a few of my favorite things

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When the dog bites

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When the bee stings

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When I’m feeling sad

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I simply remember my favorite things

And then I don’t feel so bad

One More Time!

July 9, 2014

My sisters and I were on a roll when Ellen first sent the Raindrops On Roses photo and I asked about Whiskers on Kittens – Candy’s cue to send a photo of her friends kittens.  I realize now I thought I knew the words to My Favorite Things from The Sound of Music. NEWS FLASH!  I don’t.  So I needed to check out the lyrics and see where I went off track.

Raindrops on roses

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and whiskers on kittens

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Bright copper kettles

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and warm woolen mittens

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Brown paper packages tied up with strings

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These are a few of my favorite things

That’s the first verse and we only did the first line – I went into the second verse with doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles after Ellen sent apple strudel.  By then we were off track but having fun.

Now to the 2nd verse, we have several pictures for that.

Cream colored ponies

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and crisp apple streudel

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Doorbells and
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Sleigh bells

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schnitzel with noodles

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Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings

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These are a few of my favorite things

The three of us have done well with the first two verses, it will be interesting to see what we come up with for the last 2 verses.  Thank You Ellen and Candy – this “project” is fun to do.

 

Bits And Bobs

July 6, 2014

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This is one of those times when I want to write but haven’t an idea what to write about.  Usually something has happened, I have learned or discovered something, someone said or did something  unusual – none of it comes to mind.  I ave noticed the moles are back – they have been digging in the bed by the porch and I can see the holes, not just a pile of dirt.  They are busy little bodies, that’s for sure.

I have been working on my RA book; I think I have a better handle on the program now.  I decided to use my sister Ellen’s ocean pictures for the cover and also the chapter headings – looks pretty good.  When I feel I have the hang of the program, I will work on the book about dementia – both Ellen and Candy have flower photos and I think those will fit Mom because she loved gardening.  As for my garden, well that’s another story.  Nothing else has been done since I messed up my knee – I don’t think it is the best thing to do at the moment.  I did receive the flower seed mats and I have decided to use quilt block patterns to set them out – maybe with white stones to outline them.  I need to cut them in squares and diamonds ready to be put down.

As for the knee from my slide; I am doing better, I just started my third week of it.  I have been seeing Cheryl, my chiropractor and she has helped; mostly it is resting and taking care of myself.  I don’t do a lot in a day, just what I need to do and I have been having naps at times.  I’ve been using my cane when I go out, around the house I do okay.  It was hard to bend my knee to walk and now it is slowly getting better.  I think of the things I need and want to do, then I feel too tired to do anything about it.  I keep forgetting it takes a lot of energy to deal with it and rest is so important.  This too will pass – it always does.

I look around the office and keep thinking how much I need to clean out and organize.  There are things I no longer need and when I take the clutter out of my mind and home, there will be room for new things and ideas.  I am a pack rat, though getting less so – it’s the sentimental streak that gets me.  That is how I feel about the things someone gave me, or I used to use, etc.  Too much emotion invested in things.  One thing I have been learning through Mom and dementia is to take the emotion out of it.  Taking it personally is also part of it.  Now I am working on taking the emotion out of things – I have pictures and they  have been part of my life since I can remember.  But I am living my life, not my parents’ life – I want to have my own things around me.  Not sure I remember what I have any more, 12 years is a long time.

It is our life now – Eddie’s and mine.  I guess I feel a bit disloyal selling or giving away Mom and Dad’s things.  But it is also disloyal to Eddie to not have our things upstairs.  I feel caught in the middle a bit, I want to move on with our life together.  I think I am finally at that point I am ready to let go for myself.  The advice to people is to wait a year before making any major decisions – it is almost 2 years since Mom moved to the adult family home.  She won’t be coming home or need anything now, she isn’t really aware of anything outside where she lives.  (I think I am actually writing this to myself).

This is probably the first July 4th in quite a while that we have had sun for several days.  We tend to joke that summer doesn’t start until July 5th, this is one summer that seems to be more “normal” (if you can define that).  The sun and clouds have been playing hide go seek with each other, sometimes it is a hazy sun – not my favorite.  We actually had almost 90 on Tuesday – much to warms for me.  since I found out we have a furnace fan, I turn that on to help cool things off upstairs and bring some warmth and dryness to the basement.  It works pretty well, so Eddie and I were comfortable sleeping that night.  If it is going to be partly cloudy, then make it clear blue sky, bright sun and white puffy clouds.  I don’t mind the clouds covering the sun for a bit – it has a lighter feel,  hazy sunshine reminds me too much of L.A. and smog or East Coast with hazy, hot and humid.  I think go it as the difference between having a bad headache and feeling great.

This seems to be a bit of a mind dump – just things running through my head.  It would be a whole lot longer if I wrote about everything whirling around up there.

Life Lesson

July 4, 2014

It’s the 4th of July today – we knew it was coming because there have been firecrackers going off for a week.  Strangely enough, it’s quiet at the moment – 2:15 p.m. – but I expect it will get livelier as the day goes on and it begins to be dark.  So we are in for a noisy evening and night.  We can look in all four directions and people have fireworks going off – sometimes it is hard to decide which way to turn.  The other unusual part of the day is that we have had sun and good weather quite often – we tend to say summer doesn’t start here until July 5th.

Eddie took the day off and went with me to visit Mom.  I wasn’t sure if he would because he finds it very difficult to be with her, he can’t really carry on a conversation with her.  She has been having trouble with her knee, so she has been in the wheelchair – but Judy has her use the walker to go into the tv room.  Today she was sitting in the chair, her walker near her.  So she must be doing better.  She is always ready for chocolate and cookies, I had 2 different kinds of chocolate this time.  As we were walking over from the church parking lot, Eddie said he didn’t want to stay very long.

We were there about half an hour and Judy was outside on the phone, so I couldn’t tell her we were leaving.  I went around the back door but she wasn’t outside, she was just inside the door.  She was concerned about me because we hadn’t stayed long – I told her it is hard for Eddie to see her that way.  She is so understanding and kind to me, it started my tears gathering in my eyes.  And the nicer she is to me, the more I cry.  It hit me and I was feeling upset.  I went back to the car and decided I would just feel the feeling, feel the sensations.

I can’t really describe how I was feeling,  upset is the best I can do.  So I just decided this is what I am feeling in this moment, not judging it good or bad, or criticizing or beating myself up about it.  I decided to speak my truth, though mostly it was inside me rather than telling Eddie.  It was uncomfortable to feel like that, but that was how I felt.  I felt tears spilling down my cheeks and I let them fall.  I thought about the gift in it, at that moment I didn’t see any gift.  I called on Mother/Father God, my angels, archangels, master teachers, ascended masters, spirit guides, over lighting divas and all who were there for my highest good to help and guide me to see the gift.

As I was working through it, I realized the gift was I felt my feelings and the sensations without judgment or beating myself up – just allowed them to be what they were in that moment.  Usually I will do something or go somewhere so I don’t have to feel or think about what I am feeling – not always the best idea.  It feels as if it is another step to awareness – they aren’t always comfortable or enjoyable steps, but they are necessary.

I told Judy I have had several people tell me that I will be grateful I did this for Mom – she said that was so very true.  Right now it is a bit difficult for me to see this because often I want to run away and not have to deal with it.  I also know I couldn’t live with myself if I did – I keep thinking how she has always been there for me and my sisters and it is my turn to do it for her.  I never want her to feel she has been abandoned.  I spoke to an intuitive a few weeks back and she told me my Dad’s Spirit is still here, waiting until Mom finishes what she needs to complete.  She said he is very proud of me.

It’s better now, though there is a heaviness and some draggy feelings.  The gift comes in unexpected ways, or is itself different from what I thought it would be.  Sometimes I expect things to show up in a certain way or form, when it doesn’t, I am disappointed.  I have a much easier time now just giving it to God and saying “However shows up, whatever works for me”.  I have finally learned that when I  say it has to be a certain way, I limit the Universe and miss out on all kinds of possibilities.

I also have some things to resolve with Mom, I plan to have a reading with the intuitive to see what is left unfinished.

I Am Blown Away!!!

June 29, 2014

This is my 257th blog post – with 4 drafts – and what is more amazing are the 102 followers I now have.  That is so amazing!  I was so pleased with 25 followers and now it is 4 times that amount.   I am very grateful for all of my followers, I appreciate the comments and to know there are people who are interested in my blog.

On the slight downside, I was getting a lot more spam, but I know they just want me to approve their comment so it will show up in better stats for them.  It all gets deleted, so they have wasted all that time and energy for nothing.  Recently it has slowed down to only a few at a time – I am not interested in house appraisals and inspections in Maryland, any more than all the ones from people selling cars.  Give me a break!  I don’t write anything about any of those.

As I look back over all the posts since February 2010, I started out with mostly writing about RA; then wrote at times about Ike Pono and what I was learning about myself.  Later on I wrote about my Mom and dealing with dementia and about some things going on that have nothing to do with any of the other things.   Yet, all of it affects RA and my state of mind; how can it not?  I also have learned that it is important to find the funny side of things – if I don’t laugh about it, I go nuts.

I started thinking about all the years I have had RA, all the drugs, tests, studies, procedures I have had.  When I am in the situation, odd thoughts come to me that are a bit funny.  It isn’t as though I sat there and said to myself “What’s funny here? or what does this remind me of in the past?”.   Things just came to me.  The times I have been in the hospital, I would keep a pad with me to write down my experiences.  I wrote a journal for several years and I had requests to be put on my list to send it to them.  I realized that writing helps clear things out, help me see things a bit more clearly and there is something that compels me to write things down.

Before I came back to Seattle to live, I traveled a lot with my husband and also by myself.  I would keep my journal going and at one point, I started recording it on a cassette tape.  I found someone to type those tapes out for me – when I read the typed piece, I realized I had left out things.  I may have been a little more conscious of editing because I knew someone else would see it.  People used to tell me I had such an interesting life – reading my journals didn’t have the times of pain, depression, frustration, etc. I had at the time.  I didn’t whinge because I was tired enough of it myself, I didn’t want to write about it.  Besides, who wants to read that?

When I started this blog, one thing that was important to me was not to whinge (moan and complain) because I wanted this to be a positive blog.  I’ve read other RA blogs and they tend to talk more about how they are feeling, what isn’t working, what is - I wanted to have more ideas and solutions.  I know this kind of blogs work for some and I am glad they do.  It’s just me.  I started with the Connecticut Chapter of the Arthritis Foundation doing a support group.  When I was having problems, it was good to have other people understand.  But it felt too focused on me and how I felt, I wanted to do more with people and turn outward than continually inward.

I was asked to be the Speaker’s Bureau Coordinator and later a Self Help Course  instructor and trainer.  I really enjoyed those because I interacted with people, found confidence in speaking before people and seeing something positive happening.  I usually talked about the basic fact of Arthritis – like all things, it was personal rather than just cut and dried facts.  When there wasn’t a lot of time, my stories were the first to go.  I received so much positive feedback and it made me feel so good when someone told me I had helped them so much.  I had felt things were just negative about having RA, here was such an opposite view that surprised and pleased me.

It has not only been with the Arthritis Foundation this has happened.  I have had several people tell me I am their hero.  WOW!  I was and am just being me, yet something spoke to them.  I often wonder how many  I have helped and will never know about it – but I have decided it doesn’t matter, I’m not supposed to know.  I think we all inspire people as we go along our daily life without knowing it.  To me, that is when we are most effective.  I used to think if somebody didn’t mention it, no one noticed what was happening.  But I would remember how many times I noticed something but didn’t say anything to the person.

So, to all my followers, you are the best and I truly appreciate each and every one of you.

A Bit of Sister Fun

June 27, 2014

It all started with my sister Ellen sending one of her photos and called it Raindrops on Roses.

So I emailed back – what about whiskers on kittens?  So an email went out to my sister Candy since she has a cat.  She sent back this one for whiskers on kittens – her friend’s kittens.

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Next we needed fresh apple strudel – Candy sent photo of apple blossoms, Ellen sent strudel.

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It was my turn, so I found a doorbell, sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodle.

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Things have slowed a bit, I have the feeling I am missing something.   Hmmmm, I will post this and figure out what’s missing.  Since we are now older, the three of us sisters have grown a lot closer now – I am so happy about that.  With Mom’s dementia, I  am so grateful to have such supportive, encouraging, understanding and loving sisters.  We may live far apart, but that is only in physical distance.  We are close where it counts.

 

A Short Reunion

June 24, 2014

As a result of my slide, I have become reacquainted with my cane.  It took a little practice, but I’m doing pretty well, not tripping over it so much.  It has been hard to walk since Friday afternoon and the cane has helped.  It was not my fondest wish to have this reunion, on the other hand, I am glad the cane is there.  I have had it in my car trunk for the past two years, occasionally I use it if I am not sure of the  of the terrain or if there will be a lot of people.

Black_Cane_T_HandleIt’s not a fancy cane, I bought it at Rite Aid for not too much.  I made sure it was adjustable and during out-patient rehab I asked the therapist how to measure to make sure it is the right height.

I haven’t done a lot of exercising, though Saturday I  went in a couple of places.  I was tired when we came home, so I had a lie down.  Eddie wanted to walk by the river in Renton so he could check out the flight line for the 737′s – I was quite happy sitting in the car reading.  Then we went to Panera for coffee, about the extent of walking.  Yesterday I went to see Cheryl, my chiropractor.  I explained what happened and how it had been feeling, so she worked on different places that connect with the knees.   I had an Apple One To One at 11 to work on my book.  I seem to have found something that seems to stump them a bit.  Both Larry and I learned a lot about iBooks Author – says he likes a challenge.  I told him I was ready to forget the whole thing because it has driven me crazy – but I am not about to let technology win.  I decided to go home, have something to eat and have a lie down – sometimes it is smart to do that after an adjustment.  I am glad I did because I was a bit more tired than I realized.

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One of the aspects of  RA and pain is how varied it is – with this situation at the moment, the pain has been different every day.  Friday it was sharp pain in the outside of my knee, yet Saturday it felt as if I had a tight clamp below my knee.  Sunday the clamp was in the middle of the knee and at times there was a sharper pain in the middle of the knee.  Yesterday the clamp was around the knee and today the clamp is mostly gone but the outside of the knee feels as if someone is hitting my knee each time I bend it.  That is one thing that really baffles me about RA – it is never the same from one day to the next.

Today is doctor morning, I am going to see my primary doc for a check up – he has been pleased with my progress, but not sure what he will say about this latest incident.  I don’t plan to do any “running around”, just buy some cookies for Mom for tomorrow.  She was alert and doing well last Friday, though I noticed she was in the wheel chair.  Apparently her knee was bothering her, so they use the chair.  Otherwise they make sure she uses the walker so she won’t forget how to walk.

LATER

I saw the doc and he was pleased with me – not necessarily the slide but my blood work, blood pressure, etc.  Unfortunately he weighed me and I am 15 pounds heavier – Ye God’s and Little Fishes!!!!  I suddenly realized the weight gain a week or two ago – I can’t believe I let it happen so easily.  I have spent a lot of the last few months  working a lot at the computer and not getting very much exercise; now the knee as well.  Yet I have noticed I don’t eat as much because I get full much faster and I opt for fruit for dessert at night.

I went to the store for Mom’s double stuffed Oreos and came home – I am noticing my knee is now on the side, a little below the joint and it feels like badly bruised bones.  Cheryl always says it takes some time for the body to integrate whatever happens and the next day may be uncomfortable.  I have an open house at Breakfast Club – I am hoping things will be more comfortable in the morning.  Afterward I will go see Mom.  This is not the time to put up a facade of “I’m doing fine” because I’m not.  It has worn me out and I am dragged out tired and not always sleeping well; I have trouble finding a comfortable position at night and walking is not particularly comfortable either.

I know I will come through this eventually and be more comfortable – it gets old very quickly to be hampered like this.  I have a quiet week and don’t have much on the calendar because I know rest is important.  I dealt with many other times like this one, though it doesn’t get easier and I haven’t “gotten used to it” either.   However, it doesn’t last forever, just often feels as if it does.

THIS TOO WILL PASS.

I Call It A Slide!

June 22, 2014

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An interesting  experience on Wednesday, with ongoing repercussions.  In February I passed the 2 year mark of not falling since my hip – a 30 per center.  I have done quite well so far, then  late Wednesday afternoon I went to get up from the office chair to have dinner and I found myself sliding.  I had socks on and I didn’t brace myself, so I began to slowly slide to the floor.  I knew I was in trouble but rather than panic, I was careful to see that I didn’t twist anything and only landed on the floor with a gentle bump on my left bun.  Well, that left me in a predicament about getting myself upright again.  I have had to do it before, I just walked my hips across the floor into the kitchen and over to the basement door.

Eddie was in the kitchen getting dinner ready and when he saw me working my way to the kitchen, his question was “What are you doing down there?”.   I told him I was getting myself upright, but he didn’t understand how I was going to do it.   He opened the basement door and I went to the top step, managed to get myself onto the landing and then put my feet two steps down and pulled myself up with the help of the railing.  Voila!  I was standing upright again.  I wasn’t sure how things would be after my adventure – Eddie definitely doesn’t think I should be out without a keeper, but life happens.  Life is uncertain, that’s why one eats dessert first.

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Thursday I was fine and Friday morning I was doing well – though I did hear and feel a crunch in my right knee.  I went to visit Mom and then did a a couple things I need to do.  I had walked around for a while and began to feel it in my legs, so I went to have some coffee and read bait before going on to my next item.  My legs were better, but I decided on only one more stop and then head home.  I was glad to be home and I noticed my right knee really bothering me – it has been a while since I have had that kind of pain.

I didn’t sleep very well Friday night and I had to take some Advil to relieve some of the pain.  Saturday we went out to do our usual chores, I used my cane for the first time in 2 years, took a little practice to get the hang of it again.  I stayed in the car a lot and was glad to be home again.  This morning it is still uncomfortable, but I did sleep very well last night – plus a nap yesterday afternoon when we came home.  Tomorrow I will see Dr. Cheryl and I hope she can help; she did last Monday when my hip and the back of my knee were bothering me.

That’s my story and I’m sticking with it.

Looks as though I will have to take it easy a bit to keep from making it worse.  I have another appointment at Apple tomorrow for working on my book; the more I use iBook Author, the more I learn as well as new things to frustrate me.For the RA book, I am changing my whole idea of the cover – I  am using Ellen’s ocean photos – except she usually does horizontal and the cover and Chapter pages use vertical photos.  I have found several for the Chapter headings, now I have to figure out how tot get the Table of Contents to work properly.  I am either going to become very expert at it or chuck the whole mess in the bin.  I want to learn and understand how to use it so the next 2 books will come together more easily.  I will also have to learn how to do the form for Amazon, Barnes & Noble, etc.; a whole different set up.

 

No Pictures, Just Me

June 15, 2014

I’m not sure what to call this post, seems mostly a round-up of what I have been doing this last week.  It turned out to be a busy week and at the end of each day I was beat.  Monday I went to see my chiropractor in the morning – I had been carrying rocks again Friday.  Fortunately there were very many consequences but it was god to have an adjustment nonetheless.  Then I had an Apple appointment at noon to work on my book in iBooks Author.  It has driven me crazy because I can’t figure out some of it – such as how to put my Pages copy into the format and have it work properly.  The bottom line, I have to do more copy and paste.

Even Katie, the tech, was having trouble getting it to work; I didn’t feel like so clueless after that.  Apparently the app hasn’t been updated for 2 years and I am not the only one having trouble getting it to work properly.  I will have to write to Apple feedback and tell them what is happening.  Apparently they do read it and Shawn has noticed they made changes she has written about.

After that was my caregivers support group.  I didn’t have much time to get there, so I stopped at Mrs. Field’s for a brownie, not the smartest choice, just the fastest.  When Eddie asked me later what I had for lunch, I said not the best choice, a brownie.  Then he asked me if I ate it because I was upset – an unexpected question he has never asked before.  I told him I had very little time and it was the quickest thing I could think to do.

We had a large group at the support meeting, some for the first time.  One of the advantages of having been there for a while, I am more calm when talking about Mom than I have been.  there are still times when I need support and I am so glad to have these friends there for me.  I have also been able share my experiences and resources to others who are beginning the journey.  That feels good to be able to do that – I don’t know the outcome usually, but it is not always necessary.

Tuesday I didn’t visit with Mom because I went up north with Eddie for the day.  Tuesday was the day we decided for my Queen’s Birthday.  We stopped for breakfast and I spent some time in “my office” – otherwise known as the balcony – reading until I was ready to leave.  Things are different at the Future of Flight since the coming of the new Exec Director, so I wanted make sure did what worked for Eddie.  I left and spent time in Hobby Lobby and also Pacific Fabrics before meeting the other women at the restaurant.  It felt good to sit down.

I was about half an hour early, so I found a spot and read until I saw Joyce come.  We went in together and sat at a table waiting for Char and Lois.  They came fairly soon after that and we had a lovely time.   Char brought me a chocolate bar with a card and Joyce brought a card.  We have been just doing cards lately – at this point there seem to be a lot of funny cards about older women.  Yikes!  That’s me now!

Afterwards, Char and I went to Half Priced Books to look around, then it was time for me to meet Eddie.  I told him I would wait for him in the car until he was ready – seemed to work out well.   We left at about 3, but it was 6 before we finally arrived home.  There had been an accident in the tunnel and the Viaduct was closed – you can imagine what that did to traffic.  We took I-5 to 85th and then went over to 99 – but the traffic was backed up quite a way.  Everyone was trying to find a way around the tunnel and the Viaduct – not all that easy.  We decided to go through town, just as everyone else did.  We were on 5th and suddenly the Monorail went right overhead, never been under it like that before.  It happened several times so that shows how slow we were inching our way.

Finally we found the traffic opening up a bit, so we decided to go down Airport Way – that was so much better – it was good most of the way home.  We were beat and had a light dinner – I slept so well that night that I didn’t want to get up at 5 the next morning.  But it was Breakfast Club morning and I enjoy going there.  The last 3 or 4 weeks, Eddie has been going later because the historian Mike has been away – had a knee replacement.  He is planning to come back next Wednesday.

I always enjoy being with the group, they are such good friends and colleagues.  We do have fun but we are also serious and professional about our businesses.

Afterwards I went to visit Mom, bringing cookies and chocolate.  Lately I read to her, I was finishing up one of the “The Cat Who . . . . ?” books; I brought another one on Friday to begin.  I came home shortly before Eddie did, then we went out to do some things in the afternoon.  I felt myself almost falling asleep in my chair those 3 days.

Thursday I went to the Group Training for Pages because I have been having difficulty with Eddie Round Up – the type goes small on him and he gets very frustrated with it.  I found out I need to do some adjustments before I can make it a template, then it should work properly.  I don’t think Eddie is ready for new Pages yet.  Afterwards I came home and found myself working on the book.  I had energy and enthusiasm, plus I figured out how to copy the Pages version – unfortunately only one entry at a time – so it fit in the format.  Now I need to figure out how to get the Table of Contents to behave.

While I had been at Apple, Paul and Jude cleared the house and property for me – I have to admit I didn’t feel anything different when I came home.  Wonder if the burst of energy and enthusiasm was part of it.  But that night I felt uncomfortable – no where particular, just a general uncomfortable.  I didn’t sleep very well  that night and woke up feeling crappy.  Things are better now, maybe it is going to take some time to settle down and clear out.

That’s my story and I am sticking to it.


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